Feeling So Low

 

 I'm not saying that I'm a perfect person..
At least that's what I thought I'd like to be.



Beach wavy hair, flat tummy, small thighs, cute small hands, short, slim, v-line face, big round eyes, and tall nose. That's how I imagine a perfect girl would be. But sour enough, I'm far from my own imaginations. Not gonna lie tho, sometimes I feel so low..

I'm not saying that I'm a kind person..
At least that's what I thought I'd like to be.

Popular enough because of the kindness, make friends everywhere, active in few organizations, engaged in social activity, and Saturday nights won't be such a troublesome because there is always a friend ask to go out. That's how I imagine the life of a kind person. But pathetic enough, even a boyfriend wouldn't think of me as his friend..

There are people saying this and that, here and there, and I pretend to understand them. But little they know, how may I grab their lost soul, since I lost myself, barely get a hold of what people said -me.

 

 I must say, insecurities probably my bestfriend, I've been with it since highschool. And (even I knew it was bad) I can't be separated with it.

So, I make a choice. To be grateful, to be content with myself, to say thank you each day, to be selfless, to give more, to stop saying whatever, to laugh and cry each day, and be with my own self, before be with anyone else.

Who knows, maybe one day, God may give me another chance for me, to love and to forgive, to everyone and most importantly to myself..